DISCLAIMER: Everything told in this story is from my, Rayzor’s point of view, I changed the names of the parties involved to protect their identities.
It is PROM SEASON!!! This story is all about my Senior prom and the events leading up to the prom in 1998.
Remember the time when I went completely psycho on a girl? No, I do, I remember it vividly. It is strange, I know any guys who talk about girls being crazy and I’m one. But how often do you hear a guy call himself out for trippin’ over a girl. Well that’s the next installment in Rayzor’s Romances.
Yeah we’re going back to 1998. Must of gave been a big year for me when it came to dating. I even had a “stalker” or “Catfish” situation for most of the year. But while I was taking a break from that, I think we’re talking late March of 1998. I knew my senior prom was coming and I was dateless. I considered asking Kim, you know the girl from the Catfish story. I was actually trying to build something with her. Somewhere along the line I thought about asking that girl Jillian and we know where that went. So finally I was asked by my best friend Tony, if I’d be interested in going with Kara. Kara was this good looking girl who was best friends with Tony’s girlfriend. I did not hesitate in saying yes. She was attractive and always nice to me.
One night we all hung out and things went well. It seemed like there was a spark between Kara and I so I followed my instinct. We hung out a few more times and I even went to her house to watch a movie. I won’t forget that, her dad was a state cop and he just so happened to be cleaning his weapons the day I went over.
One weekend we all went to the Zoo, Tony, me and the girls. It was a good time. Kara and I held hands and walked through the Zoo. We cuddled in the back seat of the car. It was a a really nice time. At that point I considered us “together”. That night we went to see Titanic. She had been trying to get me to see the movie and I had no interest in the movie at all. All I wanted to do was make out while the movie was on. That was my mistake and from there, things began to spiral.
Kara and I were dating and come monday, I think she realized we were dating and it was not what she wanted. But for me, I wanted to make it work. I should have taken a hint from her friend Marge. Marge approached me at school and told me not to date Kara, she was too good for me. Well, that’s fucked up. I dated Marge Freshman year and fuck that. I asked Kara and she played it off like Marge was an overprotective friend. I thought maybe Marge thought she knew me and I had a bad reputation because of Casey as a player and other possible things.
As we got closer to prom, things got worse and we started to drift pretty fast. Again, I was blinded by wanting to be with Kara and this situation actually made me a stronger, yet more guarded person. She became harder to get ahold of, she was working or couldn’t come come to the phone. I am so stupid, looking back. I wish I would have seen this in 1998. But I was having enough. I approached her at school. I asked her if we were still going to prom. I remember her telling me, “yes you’re still my prom date.” Wow, not boyfriend, not even friend. I took it at face value and moved on to getting ready for the prom.
The night has come, my senior prom. I loved dances, so I should have fun. Picked up Kara and our group, we then headed out to our first stop for dinner. The food was not great and we were all over dressed for the restaurant. We took some pictures by this fountain and then headed to the prom. The prom was fun, we danced our asses off and had a really good time. It did feel like we were a couple. It seemed like all the weirdness was gone, at least for the evening.
Things took a different turn, a turn for the worse. The after prom was kind of a nightmare and I wish I’d never gone. I am almost certain it was then that I professed my love for Kara and we were meant to be together. She became very distant again, but I couldn’t take the hint. I want to go back to my 17 year old self and she him the future and the woman I ended up with vs the way Kara ended up.
When the after prom was over we went to Kara’s house to sleep before a zoo trip with Marge and her boyfriend the following day. Here again, I wish I would have skipped this trip. I was the invisible man at the zoo. No one talked to me and I was so angry when I was dropped off that afternoon, I didn’t say anything to anyone.
Here is what happened. I was Kara’s rebound guy. She had dated this guy for a couple of years in high school and I think he cheated, I’m not sure. I was looking for a relationship and she was looking for a good time and a fun prom date. Nope, I fucked it all up for her and possibly ruined her prom. Today and for many years after, I have regretted what happened and I did try to apologize to her back in the MySpace days. I hate to think, Kara would never think that was who I am or even was at that point. She wanted a prom date and she got me being a clueless idiot. But that’s not the entire story.
I didn’t see her again until graduation. But before then I wrote her this letter that spilled it all out for her. I told her everything and explained how we were going to be great together. It was perfect because Tony and I are best friends and his girlfriend and Kara are best friends. But the letter turned out to be a bad move. Wow was it ever, she looked at me with pity when I saw her at graduation and I think she may have told me to get help. I just needed to open my eyes.
I let some time pass and tried to push on past this horrific incident….or did I? Nope, I put pen to paper again and sent her another letter professing undying love for someone I hadn’t talked to in a couple of months. I did it a couple more times and never heard back. By September I was in basic training and had a hard time dealing with that and everything going on around me. I received a letter from Kara. I was so excited, until I read it and it was, shocking to me. But it was just what I needed. It opened my eyes and was able to look back and realize I was a crazy person. Between the letters and the stuff going on in my head. This letter from Kara turned it all around. It was like that, I was instantly over her.
From that moment on, I put her behind me and moving forward with my life. It would be nearly 2 years before I ran into her again, maybe 3 or 4. I saw her in a bar and we talked for a minute and we had a dance and I felt nothing for her. I was not even attracted to her. I wish we would have had a regular friendly relationship, but I was an obsessive prom date who couldn’t let go of…well nothing. This was a dark chapter for me, I don’t know what happened and why I thought at the time, I couldn’t do better. No offense to Kara, but we both moved on to better situations. She popped on my Facebook as “people you may know” and I looked at her profile. She is married and has a few kids and yhsy is terrific. I wish her well in everything. Kara, I am sorry.
We saw Titantic together and for some reason, I thought this was “our song”. Honestly, I do not remember if we did or didn’t. We danced to My Heart Will Go On at Prom. So, there you go. Not to mention KayCee and JoJo all my life and there was one more…hmm…oh yes, one time I went to her house and we watched Grease, yeah and danced around her house together…yeah I was a fool. I read way to much into a love that was not there. I hope you enjoyed this story and I hope you enjoy these silly songs and realize how silly of a boy I was back at 18.